The Man with the Golden Gundam
by Ilondrial
Summary: 'Do you expect me to talk?' 'No Mr. Yuy. I expect you to die!' Yes, a GW James Bond spoof. Read at your peril. *Warning-may contain traces of YAOI*


Disclaimer: We don't own GW or any of it's characters. God, if we did. Poor sods.  
  
Scene 1:  
Our super-suave super-spy falls off the top floor of the Romefeller Foundation HQ with explosions echoing loudly in various parts of the building. He lands on his head, naturally, but somehow manages to break his leg anyway. He grunts at the pain, and getting up awkwardly, he removes an emergency splint from his spandex and goes about setting his own leg *wince*. He hears running footsteps, looking up he sees the approach of two heavily armed Oz officials coming towards him. He runs and dives into a roll, coming to his feet in front of the first man punches him firmly in the gut, and wrenching his gun of the unfortunate man, he spins on his heel and shoots the other man with deadly accuracy. A bullet zings off the wall next to his head. Realising there was a third man, he begins to run (with a limp). He hears the roar of motorbike coming up behind him, rapidly approaching. Some sixth sense warns 001 and he falls to the floor just in time as a bullet flies overhead. Staying on the ground, he takes careful aim with his stolen gun and shoots the officer on the bike as he speeds past, the bike flying into a ditch at the side of the road. As he reaches the bike, the first officer gains consciousness and (weakly) tries to shoot the hero (no pun intended (yeah right)), and is subsequently shot in the shoulder. The escapee mounts the bike and jump starts the engine. Not being one to waste time, he turns the bike around and runs down the foolish man. Seeing that there are no more imminent threats, he turns the bike back in the direction he was originally heading, speeding off into the sunset.  
Behind closed curtains in a undamaged room on the ground floor of the Romefeller building, a forked eyebrow is twitched in amusement. "Quite an exhibition, Mr Yuy, I shall look forward to pitting my wits against you."  
  
* * * * *   
  
"Heero. Slow down. Please."  
Heero casts a glance at the man straddling his lap and smirks as he ups the speed of Wing Zero causing the handsome young man tighten his grip on the arm rests, which for him, is an expression of pure terror. "Bastard."   
Heero smirked again, "No need for that sort of language, Trowa, although I must apologise for the lack of space in this cockpit."  
"No need to apologise," Trowa replied through gritted teeth. "I used to be a contortionist before an acrobat, I can get comfortable in stranger positions than this."  
"Really?" replied the suave spy with a raised eyebrow, "We'll have to look into that further."  
  
THE MAN WITH THE GOLDEN GUNDAM  
(Actually it's red blue and white but that kinda makes the title a bit too long)  
  
Cue: Lots of silhouettes of nubile women prancing around. (Take out the women and replace with nekkid Duos and Trowas-YUM, in Aller's case. Add the fact that the Duos and Trowas aren't exactly pleased with it.)  
Duo: Watch where you waving that whip lady!  
Lonny: Less talking , more dancing! * cracks whip menacingly *   
Trowa: Just do what she says. Maybe she'll get bored.  
Aller: Not likely. * Standing with video camera at the ready, drooling *  
Lonny: Ooh, innuendo-filled lyrics next I believe?  
  
He has a powerful weapon  
He charges a million a shot,  
An assassin that's second to none,  
The man with the golden gundam.  
  
Lurking in some darkened doorway,  
Or crouched on a roof top somewhere,  
In the next room, or this very one  
The man with the golden gundam.  
  
Love is required whenever he's hired,  
It comes just before the kill.  
No-one can catch him, no hitman can match him  
For his million dollar skill.  
  
One golden shot means another poor victim,  
Has come to a glittering end,  
For a price, he'll erase anyone  
The man with the golden gundam.  
  
His eye may be on you or me.  
Who will he bang?  
We shall see. Oh yeah!  
  
Love is required whenever he's hired,  
It comes just before the kill.  
No-one can catch him, no hitman can match him  
For his million dollar skill.  
  
One golden shot means another poor victim,  
Has come to a glittering end,  
If you want to get rid of someone,  
The man with the golden gundam.  
Will get it done  
He'll shoot anyone  
With his golden gundam.  
  
Aller: Ooh, bang me, bang me!   
Duo: * muttering * Those aren't the real lyrics.   
Lonny: They are now.  
Trowa: * sweat drop * Ignore the hentai.   
  
COMING SOON  
  
Scene 2:  
Our daredevil secret agent gets his mission and meets his GIRL * ehem* and we finally find out is Zechs a natural blond????  
  
Ja ne, minna-san!  
  
Allerhaene & Ilondrial  
  
C&C! Good, bad, indifferent, should we quit now? Let us know!  
  
  
  
  



End file.
